


The Biggest Mistake of Garreg Mach Monastery

by zurikins



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Gen, I wanted in on the chat fic fun, M/M, Nonbinary My Unit | Byleth, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Probably going to be slightly ooc, chat fic, no beta we die like Glenn, spoiler free for now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:41:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23654749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zurikins/pseuds/zurikins
Summary: lemme smash ;):im not jealouslemme smash ;):hey felix*angry noises*:nodelicate uwu:jealousy is a disease get well soon luv xoxo
Relationships: Caspar von Bergliez/Linhardt von Hevring, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan, Dorothea Arnault/Edelgard von Hresvelg, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Marianne von Edmund/Hilda Valentine Goneril
Comments: 14
Kudos: 110





	1. Bring on the chaos

**Author's Note:**

> Hello welcome to where my mind travels to when I should be being productive. 
> 
> I've taken inspiration from a few of my favourite chat fics on here and you can probably guess in what ways, I hope to be just as entertaining as they were to me and as such further chapters will be my own random ideas
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this mess of a chat fic

**[House Leader Chatroom – 9.04 am]**

**Professor Byleth:** Good Morning, Edelgard, Dimitri and Claude.

**Professor Byleth:** As you and everyone in your houses have worked so hard lately, I thought it would be a nice gift to you to allow you all to have a shared space to broaden your communication with each other and break down the walls between your individual houses.

**Professor Byleth:** It took a lot of convincing, so I am begging you not to make Lady Rhea and Seteth reconsider this luxury. 

**Professor Byleth:** As you are the house leaders you are responsible for your chats between your respective houses and have Admin rights. You are free to have private messages and create group chats as you wish. _Please_ be sensible but have fun!

**Professor Byleth:** Do not make me regret this :)

**Dimitri:** Oh what a thoughtful gift. Thank you Professor we will not let you down.

**Edelgard:** Yes, my teacher, I can assure you that I will do my absolute best to make sure everyone uses the chatrooms respectively. 

**Claude:** hell yeah this is great I can’t wait to infiltrate- I mean get to know the other houses better!

**Edelgard:** Claude von Riegan, please do not make my teacher regret giving you admin rights, better yet allowing you access to chatrooms already.

**Claude:** oh? Last time I checked Teach was ours to share.

**Professor Byleth:** …I will make the others aware in the meantime.

**[Blue Lions Chatroom – 9.10 am]**

****

**_Professor Byleth has added 8 others to the chatroom_ **

**Professor Byleth:** Good Morning Blue Lions. We have given you access to this chatroom to make communication between you easier. Dimitri has admin rights, if there are any issues please raise them with him first. Enjoy :)

****

**_Professor Byleth has left the chatroom_ **

****

**Dimitri:** Hello everyone. I’m not sure about you but I, personally, am grateful for such chatrooms to converse in and I would like it to be a step forward into becoming more comfortable around each other.

**Dimitri** : As I have admin rights, I thought one of the first steps to achieving this would be to have nicknames?

**Annette:** that sounds fun!

**Mercedes:** sure go ahead :D

**Ingrid:** That’s a great idea

**Felix:** ugh do I really have to be involved in such nonsense

**Dedue:** If it is His Highness’ wish

**Sylvain:** Wait, Your highness!

**Dimitri:** Ah please do call me Dimitri

**Dimitri:** Yes Sylvain?

**_Dimitri has changed his name to ‘Prince DAB’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Sylvain’s name to ‘lemme smash ;)’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Felix’s name to ‘*angry noises*’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Ingrid’s name to ‘I’m at my limit’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Dedue’s name to ‘Dedude’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Ashe’s name to ‘yo-yo man’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Annette’s name to ‘cinnamon babey’_ **

****

**_Prince DAB has changed Mercedes’s name to ‘Mercie’_ **

****

***angry noises*:** tch

**Mercie:** oh well some are fitting I suppose!

***angry noises*:** remind me to cut you down the next time i see you sylvain

**Dedude:** Sylvain, if I may share my thoughts

**lemme smash ;):** how have you all come to the conclusion that this was my doing

**I’m at my limit:** because we do not all lack common sense like you

**lemme smash ;):** ouch

**lemme smash ;):** and yes you may dedue

**Dedude:** Your name seems rather inappropriate for some of the members of this chat and the academy

***angry noises*:** his existence itself is inappropriate for the people around him

**lemme smash ;):** ah you flatter me~ It’s fine nothing that they don’t already know I’m sure

**I’m at my limit:** you’re an embarrassment 

**lemme smash ;):** you wound me Ingrid

**Prince DAB:** We all know how Sylvain is, if this is going to work, we must all get along regardless even if Sylvain can be inappropriate and often imprudent at times.

**yo-yo man:** I accept you Sylvain! but I won’t stand behind your skirt chasing ways

**lemme smash ;):** I’ll take it!

**[Golden Deer Chatroom – 9.15 am]**

****

**_Professor Byleth has added 8 others to the chatroom_ **

****

**Professor Byleth:** Good Morning Golden Deer. In brief a brief summary we've given you access to this chatroom to make communication between you easier. Claude has admin rights, if there are any urgent problems please come to me.

**Lysithea:** Wait professor!

**Professor Byleth:** Yes?

**Lysithea:** I have a problem you need to hear

**Professor Byleth:** Go on

**Lyisthea:** Why does Claude have admin rights?

**Professor Byleth:** He is house leader and I trust he will not let me down completely

**Leonie:** It’s the ‘completely’ that matters most in that sentence

**Professor Byleth:** Enjoy!

**_Professor Byleth has left the chatroom_ **

****

**_Claude has changed the group name to ‘Feer the Deer’_ **

****

**Lysithea:** I always knew you were dumb

**Claude:** what

**Marianne:** umm,,,

**Hilda:** SHJBFDJFK

**Claude:** WHAT I DON’T SEE THE PROBLEM

**Hilda:** CLAUDE YOU DUMB FUCK

**Hilda:** LOOK AT HOW YOU SPELT FEAR

**Claude:** oH

**Claude:** 🤡

**Lorenz:** I think we should leave it like that, as proof that Claude isn’t as smart as he says he is.

**Lysithea:** His very being is proof of that

**Claude:** I didn’t come here to be attacked

**Claude:** if you’re gonna @ me @ hilda too

**Claude:** we’re two in one

**Hilda:** unfortunately

**Claude:** ANYWAY NICKNAME TIME

****

**_[Private Message Hilda - > Claude]_ **

**Hilda:** WAIT CLAUDE LETS MATCH

**Claude:** one step ahead of you bb ;)

**[Feer the Deer Chatroom]**

**_Claude has changed his name to ‘scheming owo’_ **

****

**_scheming owo has changed Hilda’s name to ‘delicate uwu’_ **

****

**delicate uwu:** nice

**_scheming owo has changed Raphael’s name to ‘muscles of steel’_ **

**muscles of steel:** Hey it fits! Thanks buddy

****

**_scheming owo has changed Marianne’s name to ‘Marianne x’_ **

**Marianne x:** oh um,,, thank you?

****

**_scheming owo has changed Lysithea’s name to ‘Fetus’_ **

**Fetus:** If you want to see the light of day

****

**_scheming owo has changed Fetus’s name to ‘try me, b*tch’_ **

**try me, b*tch:** hmph I’ll take it

****

**_scheming owo has changed Ignatz’s name to ‘happy little cloud’_ **

**_scheming owo has changed Leonie’s name to ‘notice me senpai >.<’_ **

**Notice me senpai >.<: **change it. right now.

**_scheming owo has changed Notice me senpai >.<’s name to ‘Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<’_ **

**Lorenz:** Claude. I know we’ve had our disagreements and we may have said some things that we did not mean, but I am begging you to have mercy on my name.

**scheming owo:** oh? why don’t you and I discuss this over a cup of tea?

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **I never thought I’d see the day

**try me, b*tch:** ew

**scheming owo:** hey now i can assure you that whatever it is you think I am implying I do not intend to act out

 **  
Marianne x:** so,,, you’re not going to have a nice get together as friends…?

**scheming owo:** well…

**[Black Eagles Chatroom – 9.17 am]**

**_Professor Byleth has added 8 others to the chatroom_ **

**Professor Byleth:** Good Morning Black Eagles. You have all been granted access to this chatroom to make communication between you easier. Edelgard has admin rights, I doubt there will be any issues but if there are please raise them with her first. Have fun :)

**_Professor Byleth has left the chatroom_ **

****

**Dorothea:** Edie!!

**Edelgard:** I’m on it.

**Dorothea:** thanks princess <3

**Edelgard:** <3

**_Dorothea has changed the group name to ‘You can’t sit with us’_ **

****

**_Dorothea has changed their name to ‘_ ** **_✨girlsss_ ** **_✨’_ **

****

**_Edelgard has changed their name to ‘Dress to Empress’_ **

****

**Dress to Empress:** Okay I think this goes without saying that we should respectively use this chatroom as well as any others we may be part of in the future. I do not want to upset our Professor.

**Dress to Empress:** However, I do want us all to have fun, so I have granted you access to change your nicknames only.

**Might makes Right:** SWEEEET

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** Alright!

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** …

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** ;)<3

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** Will I never live this down?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** you brought it upon yourself sweetie

**Bernie:** aaAAH WHAT IS THIS

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** it’s a group chat for us Black Eagles, Bernie! I think Professor set up a shared group chat with the other two houses too!

**Bernie:** uHm ddoessthismeanidonthavetoleavemyroom

**I have no soul:** I am most certain that classes will still permit you to attend in person, Bernadetta

**Bernie:** AAAAA1!!!

**I have no soul:** …

**Might makes Right:** AHAHAHA THAT’S HUBERT RIGHT????

***Yawn*:** it makes sense

***Yawn*:** oh

**Petra** **🌺:** Oh Linhardt! Your name is very…accurate? Of you!

**Dress to Empress:** Well it would seem that Dorothea has kindly spared most of you the effort of changing your names.

***Yawn*:** ty dorothea

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** You’re welcome Lin! Nice to see you awake for once

**Dress to Empress:** If that is all, Dorothea and I will be leaving for a short while. Please do not do anything foolish in the meantime.

**Dress to Empress:** I’m looking at you Caspar, Ferdinand.

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR:** I am offended at the insinuation!

**Might makes Right:** Yeah!! I’m not all THAT bad

**I have no soul:** I will make sure things continue to operate smoothly, Lady Edelgard.

**Dress to Empress:** Thank you, Hubert. Enjoy the rest of your mornings!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** bye bye~

**_Dress to Empress is offline_ **

****

**_✨_ ** **_girlsss_ ** **_✨ is offine_ **

****

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** Oh to be on a date with a beautiful woman :')

**Might makes Right:** yeahhhh good luck with that pal...

**[Feer the Deer Chatroom – 9.45 am]**

**scheming owo:** um...how frowned upon is killing someone?


	2. Lorenz's Third Eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **muscles of steel:** I dunno man Claude seemed pretty convinced he killed the guy
> 
>  **Bernie:** WaAAA!?! WHCH ONE IS CLAUDE
> 
>  **lemme smash ;):** ‘WHICH ONE IS CLAUDE’ LMAO

**[Feer the Deer Chatroom – 9.45 am]**

**scheming owo:** um... how frowned upon is killing someone?

**muscles of steel:** depends on the type of murder I’d say

**try me, bitch:** ALL murder is illegal???

**Marianne x:** um,,,what happened…?

**scheming owo:** i think i killed lorenz

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **I’m sorry you did what

**scheming owo:** if it’s any consolation i didn’t mean to

**delicate uwu:** CLAUDE TELL ME YOU’RE JOKING

**scheming owo:** I’M NOT THERE’S A BODY ON MY FLOOR AND I DON’T WANT TO BE IMPRISONED

**delicate uwu:** CLAUDE

**scheming owo:** HILDA YOU HAVE TO HELP ME I’M TOO YOUNG TO GO TO JAIL

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **What, and I cannot stress this enough, the hell did you do?

**scheming owo:** NOTHING HE JST TOOK A FEW SIPS OF TEA AND COLLAPSED??!?

**scheming owo:** I DIDN’T EWVEN GET THE CHANCE TO AKS HIM TO TRY MY POISON

**delicate uwu:** STAY WHERE YOU ARE I’M COMING

**Marianne x:** aah i’ll come too,,

**delicate uwu:** thanks mari you’re a babe

**_delicate uwu is offline_ **

****

**_Marianne x is offline_ **

****

****

**[Shared Chatroom – 10.12 am]**

**lemme smash ;):** uh why is hilda carrying lorenz like a sack of potatoes

**muscles of steel:** Claude killed Lorenz

**I’m at my limit:** What

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** What

**lemme smash ;):** im sorry he did what now

**Bernie:** tHRES A KILLER?!! IM SORRY I DIDNTMEAN TO PLEASWE DON’T KILL MEEEE

**Prince DAB:** _What_ did Claude do?

**happy little cloud:** He did say that he didn’t do anything but offer Lorenz tea and he just collapsed after a few sips

**lemme smash ;):** claude really went and killed him with kindness no one doing it like him

**Petra** **🌺:** Killed him with kindness?? I was not aware of such ways of killing. How does one be killing with kindness?

**I have no soul:** It is a figurative saying, Petra. It is not meant to be taken literally.

**muscles of steel:** I dunno man Claude seemed pretty convinced he killed the guy

**Bernie:** WaAAA!?! WHCH ONE IS CLAUDE

**lemme smash ;): ‘** WHICH ONE IS CLAUDE’ LMAO

**Prince DAB:** Is Claude okay?

***angry noises*:** claude is not the one who’s hurt

**Prince DAB:** I am just concerned

**Mercie:** Mm that’s right, he could be panicking right now.

**yo-yo man:** Maybe someone from the Golden Deer should check on Claude too?

**lemme smash ;):** i think you just destroyed his highness’ plans buddy

**delicate uwu:** false alarm guys lorenz woke up

**Mercie:** That’s great news! Is he doing okay?

**Marianne x:**!!!!

**delicate uwu:** LNAODHJGKJ HE JUST

**delicate uwu:** HE JST WALKE D INTO A WALL

**Mercie:** oh my

**cinnamon babey:** :0

**[Private message delicate uwu - > scheming owo] **

**delicate uwu:** CLAUDE YOU HAVE TI COME SEEHTIS

**[Shared Chatroom – 10.23]**

**delicate uwu:** HE KNOCKED HIMSELF OUT AGAINFDJBGJ

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** Is this really what the Golden Deer is like?

**lemme smash ;):** i do love how none of them have checked if he’s okay

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **Marianne what’s the situation?

**Mariannne x:** ah,, Lorenz is out cold and um,, hilda just fell over from laughing too hard,,

**Marianne x:** oh Claude is here

**Marianne x:** ohh,,, he’s laughing too,,,

***angry noises*:** guess that answers the boar’s question

**Mercie:** Do you want our assistance taking him to the infirmary?

**Marianne x:** That might be good,,,please—if you don’t mind!!

**Prince DAB:** Dedue and I are on our way.

**Marianne x:** Thank you!!

**[‘You can’t sit with us’ Chatroom - 10.30 am]**

**Might makes Right:** man the Golden Deer house seems wild I almost wanna join them

**_Dress to Empress is online_ **

****

**Might makes Right:** Gahh!

**Dress to Empress:** You will do nothing of the sort.

**I have no soul:** Lady Edelgard have you returned?

**Dress to Empress:** Yes Dorothea have just come back to the school grounds.

**Dress to Empress:** I have not had time to read up on the shared chat, what’s this about Claude killing someone?

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** Apparently Claude invited Lorenz over for tea and after a few sips Lorenz simply collapsed.

**I have no soul:** I must see for myself what sort of tea that is.

**Dress to Empress:** It’s only been 2 hours since Professor has granted us access to this chatroom and Claude has already murdered someone. I don’t know what I expected.

**Petra** **🌺:** I am having question.

**Petra** **🌺:** Hubert has said that ‘killing with kindness’ was only a saying, and Lorenz is now awake, if that is correct then how is Lorenz dead?

**Might makes Right:** didn’t ay hear the dude knocked himself out

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** I’ve heard that he rambles on about nobility, but does he really consider it noble to make an embarrassment of himself, especially in the presence of women? I ought to show him how it’s done!!

**_✨_ ** **_girlsss_ ** **_✨_ ** **_is online_ **

****

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** My, my, Ferdie. Haven’t you made an embarrassment of yourself in front of women enough already?

**Might makes Right:** AHAHJAHS TELL HIM DOROTGEA

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** I will not stand for this! It was one time!!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** Then you might want to sit down sweetie, I have a lot of evidence that suggest otherwise ~

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** I’m

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!

**Might makes Right:** FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!!

**Petra** **🌺:** FERDINAND VON AEGIR??

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** ,

**_I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!! is offline_ **

****

**[Shared Chatroom – 12.04 pm]**

**Mercie:** Is there any update on Lorenz’s condition?

**Marianne x:** aa! Um Professor Manuela said that he might have a tiny bit of concussion depending on how hard he hit his head,,,but he should wake up soon,,,

**delicate uwu:** we’re on our way to visit him again

**Dress to Empress:** Really, Claude, I am shocked at how fast you can cause trouble.

**scheming owo:** hello to you too princess

**scheming owo:** ill have you no i did nothing this time!!

**scheming owo:** hilda back me up

**delicate uwu:** professor manuela did verify that the tea lorenz drank was simply tea

***angry noises*:** and yet still you stood and laughed at him

**Dress to Empress:** Is that really how you treat your fellow classmates, von Riegan?

**scheming owo:** why am i getting torn into ???

**scheming owo:** if I remember correctly it was hilda who laughed the hardest

**delicate uwu:** CLAUDE

**scheming owo:** im sorry hilda if I’m getting torn into so are you it’s in the pact

**lemme smash ;):** you guys have a pact

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **It goes on for about 10 pages

**lemme smash ;):** you’ve seen their pact??

**try me, bitch:** we all had to watch them sign it

**scheming owo:** are you jealous of our friendship is better than yours sylvain

**delicate uwu:** we even match

**try me, bitch:** in the worst way possible

**lemme smash ;):** im not jealous

**lemme smash ;):** hey felix

***angry noises*:** no

**lemme smash:** ingrid my girl

**I’m at my limit:** absolutely not

**scheming owo:** LMAOSFDHF

**delicate uwu:** jealousy is a disease get well soon luv xoxo

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** Hilda I love you

**delicate uwu:** omg ily too look at this woman solidarity 

**Dress to Empress:** That does not excuse the point.

**Marianne x:** u,m,,, it was kinda funny,,

**delicate uwu:** YES MARI

**scheming owo:** THIS IS WHY YOU’RE BEST GIRL

**_scheming owo has changed Marianne x’s name to ‘Best Girl <3’ _ **

****

**Best Girl <3: **oh um,,,, thank you?? I really,, don’t think I deserve such a title,,,

**delicate uwu:** nonsense! you’re wonderful marianne <3

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** I would be offended if I didn’t think they were right

**cinnamon babey:** You deserve it Marianne!! : D

**Best Girl <3: **aaaa ,,,thankyou

**Mercie:** Not to ruin a heartfelt moment but, have any of you made it to Lorenz yet?

**delicate uwu:** oh right

**lemme smash ;):** golden deer be like ‘what’s a lorenz’

**try me, bitch:** pffffff

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **fdhbjhgfh

**muscles of steel:** AHAHAHA

**I’m at my limit:** Lorenz must be really feeling the love

**Dress to Empress:** Do you still want to join the Golden Deer after seeing how they treat each other, Caspar? 

**scheming owo:** oh? you want to join our fun?

**scheming owo:** we can make your meme dreams come true 

**delicate uwu:** also claude's hot   
  
  
  
***angry noises*:** you'll entice the boar 

**scheming owo:** holy shit

**Prince DAB:** Is something wrong, Claude?

**✨** **girlsss✨:** he completely ignored the comment about being enticed 

**lemme smash ;):** and here you see his highness only come online should something happen to the one and only Claude von Riegan

**scheming owo:** LORENZ HAS A THIRD EYE

**delicate uwu:** HDSJBFDJKFS

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** he has a what

**scheming owo:** HE HAS A THIRD EYE HIS TRUE FORM HAS FINALLY BEEN REVEALED

**Dress to Empress:** What on earth are you talking about?

**delicate uwu:** HE HAS A LUMP ON HIS FOREHEAD

**delicate uwu:** CLAUDE WHAT ARE YOY

**delicate uwu:** HFJBFJGGFGJ

**scheming owo: _[Image attachment: LORENZ_HAS_A_THIRD_EYE.img]_**

****

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** LMFADDBKHFG

**lemme smash ;):** I’M CRY IGN

**Prince DAB:** It oddly suits him

**scheming owo:** DIMITRIG GHG??!

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **We’ll be sure to let him know

**delicate uwu:** hE’s WAKING UP

**scheming owo:** ABORT MISSION

**scheming owo:** NOBODY SAU A WORD

**[Feer the Deer Chatroom – 12. 44pm]**

**Lorenz:** CLAUDE VON RIEGAN

**scheming owo:** damn

**[House Leader Chatroom – 6.00 pm]**

**_Professor Byleth has entered the chatroom_ **

****

**Professor Byleth:** Good Evening :)

**Professor Byleth:** How was the first day with the chatrooms?

**Dress to Empress:** I am happy to report no major difficulties or problems, My teacher!

**Prince DAB:** Indeed! I think we all enjoyed ourselves

**scheming owo:** best decision you guys have ever made teach!

**Professor Byleth:** I do hope Lorenz agrees with you, Claude.

**scheming owo:** sooo you heard about that huh

**Professor Byleth:** Please try and keep causalities to a minimum

**Professor Byleth:** Though I will admit we did all get a laugh out of it

**Professor Byleth:** Don't tell anyone that I told you that

**Professor Byleth:** Enjoy the rest of your evenings, please remind your classmates not to neglect their studies!

**_Professor Byleth has left the chatroom_ **

**scheming owo:** and this is why teach is the best


	3. Do not eat the weeds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **lemme smash ;):** L INHADRT COME GET YOUR DOG
> 
>  ***Yawn*:** hmm he don’t bite
> 
>  **lemme smash ;):** HE’S RUNNIG WITH AN A XE

**[Shared Chatroom – 1.25 pm]**

**Dedude:** Please do not eat the weeds.

**I’m at my limit:**?????

**lemme smash ;):** is this some kind of public service announcement???

**Dedude:** Apologies that was meant to be a private message to His Highness.

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:**??!?

**Might makes Right:** wHA

**delicate uwu:** aw c’mon you can’t just leave us hanging like that

**lemme smash ;):** ah man this is great

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** Care to enlighten us????

**Prince DAB:** Please do not.

**scheming owo:** what’s this about weeds

**Prince DAB:** Oh heavens no

**lemme smash ;):** so I’m minding my own business right

**I’m at my limit:** He said, you know, like a liar

**Prince DAB:** I had simply heard that some plants amongst weeds were edible, that is all.

**lemme smash ;):** is this the same as when you were a kid

**Dress to Empress:** Just how many times has Dimitri tried to eat weeds?

**scheming owo:** oh gods don’t tell me dimitri ate weeds as a kid

**Prince DAB:** I did nothing of the sort, I assure you Claude.

**lemme smash ;):** can you imagine how dimitri would look high

**scheming owo:** hot

**scheming owo:** *what

**lemme smash ;):** there’s no saving yourself there man

**scheming owo:** I MESNT HOT

**scheming owo:** FUCK

**scheming owo:** WHAT

**Mercie:** Language!

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **Please forgive him

***angry noises*:** congratulations i think you just broke his boarliness

***angry noises*: _[Image attachment: congratulations_you_made_him_break_his_spear.img]_**

****

**cinnamon babey:** :0

**I’m at my limit:** PFFFSHFD

**delicate uwu:** claude give me your phone

**delicate uwu:** you can get it back when you stop being gay as fuck

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** tried it 10/10 not a good experience

**lemme smash ;):** f in the chat for the moronsexuals

**Might makes Right:** f

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** f

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **f

**cinnamon babey:** f

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** f

**I’m at my limit:** Like you can talk Sylvain

**lemme smash ;):** i have no idea what you’re talking about my lady

**Petra** **🌺:** what is a ‘moronsexual?’

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** I’ll explain it to you in DM sweetie

**Petra** **🌺:** I am having many gratitude

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** <33

**lemme smash ;):** is dimitri okay tho he’s been gone a while

**Prince DAB:** I am fine

**Prince DAB:** Can we please not discuss me being ‘high’? It won’t ever happen.

**Dress to Empress:** Considering Dedue has just asked you not to eat the weeds I think I might happen a lot sooner than you think

**Might makes Right:** yu know what they say

**Might makes Right:** 420 blaze it

**I have no soul:** Not one person has ever said that.

**Might makes Right:** how can you know for sure? you don’t know everybody

**I have no soul:** I know more than you think.

**lemme smash ;):** oh please im begging you let me be there when you do get high

**Dedude:** You are the last person I would trust with His Highness in such a vulnerable state.

**Prince DAB:** Enough please.

**[Private message** **✨** **girlsss** **✨ - > Petra** **🌺]**

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Moronsexual is where a person is attracted to someone of…lets say a lower intelligence

**Petra** **🌺:** Since I am having lower intelligence than the people of Fódlan is everyone a moronsexual towards me if showing interest?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** No, no, no! You are very intelligent you just have yet to become accustomed to the language of Fódlan! You’re doing great hun!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** A more accurate explanation could be…someone attracted to idiots and ‘dumbasses’. Dimitri and Claude are a good example because Dimitri is oblivious, and Claude often acts like a ‘dumbass’ or ‘idiot’.

**Petra** **🌺:** Oh! I think I am having understanding. Thank you, Dorothea you are…very kind?!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** I am happy to help in any way! <3

**[New Chatroom – 2.05 pm]**

**_scheming owo has added delicate uwu & lemme smash ;) to a group _ **

****

**lemme smash ;):** oh does this mean you’ve stopped being gay claude

**scheming owo:** not in the slightest

**scheming owo:** my free trial has ended not a good experience still a raging bisexual disaster

**scheming owo:** thanks for taking over hilds

**delicate uwu:** i did what had to be done to protect you

**lemme smash ;):** to what do i owe the pleasure of being in a private dm with you two

**lemme smash ;):** as far as im concerned i haven’t signed any pact or agreements

**delicate uwu:** have you still not recovered? oh dear that’s a bad sign

**scheming owo:** we’re giving you the chance to have friends you should be grateful

**scheming owo:** of course it won’t be anything like the bond me and hilda have

**lemme smash ;):** guess i’ll take it ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**delicate uwu:** don’t tell me you don’t actually realise the purpose of this chat

**lemme smash ;):** so I’m not gaining any friends???

**delicate uwu:** we have a gay in denial on our hands claude this’ll be tough

**scheming owo:** we know you like felix the sooner you accept it the more chaotic it’ll be

**lemme smash ;):** i have no idea what you’re talking about

**Iemme smash ;):** but let me ask you

**lemme smash ;):** what did you hope to gain out of this chat

**lemme smash ;):** no offence but claude, you don’t seem like you’re planning on making a move on our prince and hilda im not even entirely sure who you like

**scheming owo:** damn he’s got a point

**delicate uwu:** at least im doing a good job of being subtle

**scheming owo:** wait I have an idea

**_scheming owo has added_ ** **_✨_ ** **_girlsss_ ** **_✨_ ** **_to the group_ **

****

**delicate uwu:** claude you’re a genius!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** oh what’s this?

**delicate uwu:** dorothea !!!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** hilda !!! <3333

**lemme smash ;):** well if it isn’t the most beautiful woman in the monastery

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Sylvain love if it didn’t work before it’s not going to work now

**lemme smash ;):** worth a shot

**scheming owo:** dorothea you’ve got to help us

**delicate uwu:** we’re dumb gay and in love

**scheming owo:** hilda that’s amazing

**_scheming owo has changed the group name to ‘dumb gay and in love’_ **

****

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** oh!! I see this is like a romance support group! It’s been so long since I’ve had a nice chat about relationships ~

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Let’s see

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Claude has got the hots for the Blue Lions Prince, correct?

**scheming owo:** overwhelmingly so

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Hilda you must like….

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Marianne?

**delicate uwu:** wooow you’re good!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** So that leaves Sylvain to like Felix!

**lemme smash ;):** not at all

**scheming owo:** he’s in the first stage of denial

**delicate uwu:** you’re the only one amongst us all who’s in a relationship right??

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Oh it seems I am

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Does this mean I get the role of cupid~? Ahh I could write an opera based on this!

**scheming owo:** hold your horses you’ve got to help us first songstress

**delicate uwu:** how did you manage to tie down the princess?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Well, I was no different to you guys. In fact I would say I was like all three of you in some ways.

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** But that’s a story for another day

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** What matters is that Big sister Dorothea is here to over see the pining~

**delicate uwu:** there’s no helping us is there

**scheming owo:** guess we’ll just have to be each other’s emotional support gays

**[‘You can’t sit with us’ Chatroom – 9.45 pm]**

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** help how do you fix a kitchen

**Might makes Right:** what liek a whole kitchen??

**Dress to Empress:** Dorothea…

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** It wasn’t me I swear Edie!!

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** I was trying to help Annette and Mercedes cook a meal

**Might makes Right:** aaattt almost ten pm?

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** How bad is the kitchen?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** It’s steaming heavily

**Dress to Empress:** Have you gotten out? Please tell me you’ve gotten out.

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** we’re out we’re out!!

**[Blue Lions Chatroom – 9.50 pm]**

**Dedude:** Your highness please tell me you did not try and cook the weeds

**Prince DAB:** Have more faith in me Dedue. I’ll have you know I’m still at the training grounds with Felix.

**yo-yo man:** Has something happened to the kitchen?

**[Shared Chatroom – 9.51 pm]**

**delicate uwu:** ummm am I crazy or is the mess hall smoking

**Bernie:** AN ATTACK?!”?!

**Best Girl <3: **who could have done such a thing,,,?

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **Who’s going to tell Professor?

**delicate uwu:** more like who’s gonna break it to raph

**scheming owo:** wait ive got to see this

**lemme smash ;):** it’s not on fire is it

**delicate uwu:** claude I swear to the goddess if you walk into that steaming kitchen

**Prince DAB:** Claude????

**scheming owo:** chillax ive done worse

**scheming owo:** the damage isn’t that bad just blackened out

**scheming owo:** the foods ruined tho

**muscles of steel:** but the kitchen is okay???

**scheming owo:** the kitchen just needs a clean and a therapy session

**I’m at my limit:** don’t we all

**Mercie:** Annie you can stop crying it’s okay!!

**cinnamon babey:** I’m really sorry!!! I’m always messing things up

**lemme smash ;):** funny how us lot were quick to assume it was dimitri

**Dress to Empress:** I won’t lie I expected this of the Golden Deer house not the Blue Lions

**Might makes Right:** what abput dorothea

**Dress to Empress:** Well…

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** Edie! You can’t possibly think I would destroy the kitchen could you?!

**Petra** **🌺:** If I may be sharing my thoughts. Dorothea your cooking is what they say…Horrendous?

**scheming owo:** ouch

**yo-yo man:** Dedue and I will help fix it

**lemme smash ;):** it’s always dedue to the rescue

**I’m at my limit:** You’re such a great guy Dedue

**delicate uwu:** he’s like superman

**cinnamon babey:** and Ashe!! He’s helped us a lot in the kitchen

**scheming owo:** ashe and dedue for world leaders

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** After my Edie of course!

**Mercie:** What about Dimitri?

***angry noises*:** that boar could not lead the world he can hardly lead this house

**Might makes Right:** OHH WRECKED

**Dedude:** Do not speak of His Highness that way

**try me, bitch:** If anything you should be saying that about Claude

**scheming owo:** i am jsut sitting here

**scheming owo:** anws isn’t it past your bedtime? don’t wanna be awake for when the ghosts come out

**Prince DAB:** Please let’s not fight.

**Prince DAB:** I personally think Claude would do a good job of leading the world

***angry noises*:** of course you do

**Prince DAB:** As well as Edelgard, Dedue and Ashe

**Prince DAB:** You’ve all got what it takes!

**Mercie:** Awww how sweet

**scheming owo:** dimitri loving hours

**[Private message delicate uwu - > scheming owo] **

**delicate uwu:** dimitri loving hours???

**delicate uwu:** could you be any more obvious?

**scheming owo:** listen I didn’t know what else to say

**delicate uwu:** maybe Thank You???

**[Shared Chatroom – 10.07pm]**

**Dress to Empress:** That is rather sweet of you, Dimitri, but as the next King of Faerghus you must think more highly of yourself or it may be swept away from you.

**Prince DAB:** Ah yes of course…

**lemme smash ;):** well then

**happy little cloud:** Ah!! Raphael where are you going?!

**muscles of steel:** to mend the kitchen

**scheming owo:** you guys we forgot the real ship here

**scheming owo:** raphael and the kitchen

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **And food

**cinnamon babey:** poly rights!!!

**lemme smash ;):** that’s much better than what i was going to say

**I’m at my limit:** Believe me no one wants to hear what you were going to say

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** Seeing as it is quite late it might take a while for the dining hall to be back to its original state, so where are we going to eat in the morning?

**Dress to Empress:** I’m sure we can all wait a little while for food

**scheming owo:** you’re asking raphael to die

**Might makes Right:** I can’t wait for food!! I’n a growin boy you know!!

**I have no soul:** Are you really?

**lemme smash ;):** you’re like 3 feet tall

**scheming owo:** that’s lysithea

**try me, bitch:** fuck off

**Might makes Right:** thats it

**Might makes Right:** yuor kneecaps hand em over

**lemme smash ;):** wha t

**Might makes Right:** you heard me

**Mercie:** That’s a very unpleasant thought

**lemme smash ;):** i quite like being tall

**Might makes Right:** you wont be for long

**lemme smash ;):** w hat

**Might makes Right:** best sleep with one ey e open pal

**I am FERDINAND VON AEGIR!!:** When did Capsar become so ominous?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** It seems when his height gets mocked he goes into Hubie mode

**delicate uwu:** FDJBGKJGG

**lemme smash ;):** it’s because he’s closer to the ground

**lemme smash ;):** yknow the devil

**scheming owo:** don’t let lady rhea and seteth hear you

**scheming owo:** they’ll start exorcising small people

**lemme smash ;):** probably do them good for their pent up anger

**I’m at my limit:** Sylvain I hope you know of your audience

**lemme smash ;):** OH FFCK THERE’S AN ANGRY LITTLE S HORT BOY AGTER ME

**Might makes Right:** COME BACK HERE

**lemme smash ;):** L INHADRT COME GET YOUR DOG

***Yawn*:** hmm he don’t bite

**lemme smash ;):** HE’S RUNNIG WITH AN A XE

**scheming owo:** can we all just appreciate how linhardt accepted his role as caspar’s owner

**lemme smash ;):** LETS NOTTALK AB OUT THEIR BEDROOM PRWFERNCES RN

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** SDHFDJFD?!?”?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨** **:** THEY’RE BABIES DON’T SAY SUXH THINGS

***angry noises*:** this house is fucking nightmare

**muscles of steel:** the food…

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **Don’t worry buddy we’ll figure it out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip lorenz 
> 
> i didn’t expect so many people to have read this already thank you so much??


	4. Sylvain's disappearance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **lemme smash ;):** oh my I don’t think i’ve ever had this much female attention
> 
>  **lemme smash ;):** don’t worry ladies there’s plenty of me to go around *rips arm off* this one’s for you Ingrid

**[Shared Chatroom – 8.00 am]**

**_Professor Byleth is online._ **

**Professor Byleth:** Good morning everyone. I have a few questions that I would like to confirm with you.

**Professor Byleth:** Firstly, Seteth has asked me to find out what happened to the dining hall last night.

**cinnamon babey:** I’m so sorry!!! I’ll never touch food again in my life!! I’ll stop being so clumsy I promise!!!

**Mercie:** I am at fault too, Professor. I should have noticed that there wasn’t any oil in the frying pan.

**Dress to Empress:** Dorothea?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** All I did was offer my opinions!

**cinnamon babey:** It was all my fault I’ll take the punishment Professor!! T~T

**Professor Byleth:** Thank you for telling me.

**Professor Byleth:** I hadn’t come in here with the intention of punishing anyone.

**Professor Byleth:** If you could please help the kitchen staff clean up and replace the foods then we will put it behind us :)

**cinnamon babey:** Really??

**Mercie:** How kind of you, we’ll get right to it!

**Professor Byleth:** My second query is that I had reports of someone being chased around with an axe, I don’t want to make any assumptions here…

**Dress to Empress:** It seems Caspar might still be asleep or at the training grounds, so I will take responsibility for his actions. Sylvain had been poking fun at Caspar’s height and Caspar let his anger get the better of him. I am truly sorry, my teacher, I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.

**Professor Byleth:** Ah I should have guessed Sylvain would be involved…

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** HASHSHFJ

**I’m at my limit:** I don’t even blame you

**Prince DAB:** I will take responsibility for Sylvain too. Sorry about that Professor, I will see to it that Sylvain acts more respectively.

***angry noises*:** good luck with that

**Professor Byleth:** That would be very appreciated. This ties on to my last point, please be mindful of your behaviour these upcoming weeks as a curfew is looking to be put in place should we hear any more reports like this. In Lady Rhea's words.

**Professor Byleth:** I don’t want you all to be restricted or treated like children.

**try me, bitch:** I’ve never been gladder for Claude not to be online.

**Professor Byleth:** Lysithea?

**try me, bitch:** Yes?

**try me, bitch:** Oh

**try me, bitch:** Claude.

**Professor Byleth:** Thought so.

**_Lorenz is online_ **

****

**Lorenz:** Professor! What a lovely coincidence that you would be online as I choose to come on.

**Lorenz:** Would you care to join me for Monday morning cup of tea?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** I’m surprised you’re not put off tea after last time.

**Lorenz:** Nothing could deter me from wanting to have tea with our Professor!

**Professor Byleth:** Ah Lorenz, nice to see you in high spirits

**Professor Byleth:** I’m afraid I must be reporting to Lady Rhea before classes.

**Professor Byleth:** Enjoy your morning!

**_Professor Byleth is offline_ **

****

**I’m at my limit:** I’m sorry for your loss

**Lorenz:** Nonsense! They were simply too busy this time! I’ll catch them another time.

**Lorenz:** If you’ll excuse me.

**_Lorenz is offline_ **

**try me, bitch:** He won’t

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **Definitely not

**[Blue Lions Chatroom – 8.43 am]**

**yo-yo man:** Has anyone else found it especially quiet this morning?

**Mercie:** Ah yes! I thought it was just me

***angry noises*:** none of the loudmouths are online

**Prince DAB:** It is strange, normally most of us would be online by now. Especially Sylvain.

**cinnamon babey:** Have we heard anything back from Sylvain since last night?

**I’m at my limit:** Now that I think about it, I don’t believe we have

**Mercie:** Should we check in with the others to see if they know anything?

**cinnamon babey:** Let’s do that!!

**[Shared Chatroom – 8.52 am]**

**Prince DAB:** Has anyone heard from Sylvain at all?

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** I haven’t heard anything since his last message here

**muscles of steel:** he hasn’t passed by the dining hall that’s for sure

**Best Girl <3: **Um,,,wasn’t Caspar the last person to see him,,,?

**Dress to Empress:** @ **Might_makes_Right**

**Might makes Right:** somebody call for me?

**Dress to Empress:** Do you have any idea of Sylvain’s whereabouts?

**Might makes Right:** sylwho?

**Might makes Right:** oHHh

**Might makes Right:** Well I remember chasing him then he suddenly dipped and I coludnt find him so I lefft

**Might makes Right:** if he’s hurt its not my faukt!

**Mercie:** Well it would seem Caspar is the last person to have seen Sylvain so where could he be?

**Prince DAB:** Perhaps we should hold a search for him?

**yo-yo man:** But Your Highness! Classes are about to start

***angry noises*:** all in favour of leaving sylvain till later say I

**I’m at my limit:** I

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** I

**try me, bitch:** I

**Dress to Empress:** I

**Petra** **🌺:** I?

***angry noises*:** there you have it

**Prince DAB:** Alright then, I suppose we shall leave it to after classes.

**[Shared Chatroom – 4.03 pm]**

**Mercie:** Any sights of Sylvain?

**happy little cloud:** none from here!

**Dress to Empress:** We haven’t seen or heard anything either.

**Mercie:** Oh dear I’m starting to get worried.

**Notice me Captain Jeralt >.<: **Has anything like this happened before?

***angry noises*:** this is sylvain we’re talking about

***angry noises*:** of course it has

**Prince DAB:** Still I am concerned also, normally at least one of us would know of his whereabouts.

**Prince DAB:** Also, it is rather strange not to see Claude or Hilda online.

**delicate uwu:** oh? we were missed?

**delicate uwu:** i think claude’s in the library he said he had this epiphany that he needed to test

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** Hilda!! Where were you?

**delicate uwu:** im with marianne!!

**Prince DAB:** So it is only Sylvain’s disappearance that is a cause of concern.

**Prince DAB:** I suppose we should search a little more before alerting the Professors.

**Mercie:** Let’s all split up and look around different parts of the monastery!

**Might makes Right:** linhardt asks if all of us needs to

**Dress to Empress:** If he wants me to excuse his absence in classes today, then yes, he must join this search.

**Prince DAB:** Alright if we do not find Sylvain we meet back here in an hour.

**[Private message *angry noises* - > lemme smash ;)] **

***angry noises*:** you fool what do u think youre playing at **[8.45 am]**

***angry noises*:** answer me **[1.27 pm]**

***angry noises*:** youre making everyone search for you like youre some kind of important figure **[4.15 pm]**

***angry noises*:** if you come back hurt ill kill you **[4.34 pm]**

***angry noises*:** Sylvain. **[4.55 pm]**

**[Shared Chatroom – 5pm]**

**cinnamon babey:** This is really worrying

**Mercie:** He’s never left for this long before

**Dress to Empress:** Perhaps it is time to inform our Professor?

**Prince DAB:** Indeed this may call for a more in depth search.

**lemme smash ;):** oh what’re we looking for?

**cinnamon babey:** SYLVAIN

**Mercie:** Sylvain!!!!

**I’m at my limit:** SYLVAIN WHERE THE HECK WERE YOU

**lemme smash ;):** oh my I don’t think i’ve ever had this much female attention

**lemme smash ;):** don’t worry ladies there’s plenty of me to go around *rips arm off* this one’s for you Ingrid

**lemme smash ;):** but to answer your question, i sweet talked a lovely maiden into letting me hide out in her room

**lemme smash ;):** my phone died so i was unaware of the time

**I’m at my limit:** YOU MORON YOU ABSOLUTE FOOL

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** I think my Ingrid’s name applies now more than ever

**Dress to Empress:** Sylvain I hope you are aware of the severity of your actions. Not only did you worry us all, but you almost made us go to the Professors about your disappearance, and you almost made Caspar cry. If we had reported this there would no doubt be curfews set and stricter measures for our safety.

**Might makes Right:** hEY I did not cru

**lemme smash ;):** all jokes aside, i really am sorry for worrying you guys

**lemme smash ;):** It won’t happen again I mean it.

**lemme smash ;):** And I’ll come and apologise to you directly Caspar.

**Mercie:** I’m just glad you’re safe Sylvain!

**cinnamon babey:** Me too!!

**Dedude:** Your return comes as a great relief Sylvain.

**Prince DAB:** Sylvain I ask that you come see me after you have apologised to Caspar.

**lemme smash ;):** got it

**[‘dumb gay and in love’ Chatroom – 8 pm]**

**scheming owo:** oh damn a lot happened since i was caught up in the library huh

**delicate uwu:** how nice of you to join us again

**scheming owo:** i missed you too hilds <3

**delicate uwu:** Was your hypothesis correct?

**scheming owo:** i couldn’t come to a detailed enough conclusion

**scheming owo:** seteth got rid of all the good books :/ but i think im on the right lines 

**scheming owo:** it was worth it however because I gained a new piece of information

**scheming owo:** but that’s besides the point, sylvain what the hell were you playing at man

**lemme smash ;):** it was worth it too

**lemme smash ;):** look at this

**lemme smash ;): _[Image attachment: felix_cares_about_me.img]_**

****

**delicate uwu:** looks like a bunch of insults to me

**lemme smash ;):** that’s just how felix shows he cares

**lemme smash ;):** he even capitalised my name! he never does that!

**scheming owo:** are you finally coming to terms with your love?

**lemme smash ;):** now I never said that

**scheming owo:** speaking of, hilds how was your day with marianne ?

**delicate uwu:** it was great until we had to look for SOMEONE

**lemme smash ;):** How many times do I need to say im sorry, I’ve already had an earful from Dimitri, Edelgard _and_ Dorothea

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** Hmph it’s your own fault for being so careless, you’re lucky Edie was there to hold me back.

**scheming owo:** you really are the chaotic one out of the bl huh

**delicate uwu:** claude have you talked to dimitri

**scheming owo:** ya he sent a few messages checking in on me

**scheming owo:** but i don’t think I’ll be leaving this library any time soon

**delicate uwu:** is your research really more important than your boyfriend

**scheming owo:** im about to ruin this whole monastery’s career

**scheming owo:** mysteries and secrets are always worth it

**scheming owo:** and he’s not my boyfriend

**delicate uwu:** sadly

**✨** **girlsss** **✨:** sadly

**lemme smash:** sadly

**[Private message lemme smash ;) - > *angry noises*]**

**lemme smash ;):** are you still mad at me

**lemme smash ;):** ill make it up to you I swear

**lemme smash ;):** you can kill me if you want i know im not hurt

**lemme smash ;):** pls answer me

**lemme smash ;):** fe :(

**[Private message lemme smash ;) - > cinnamon babey]**

**lemme smash ;):** Annette!

**lemme smash ;):** You know I’m really sorry right??

**lemme smash ;):** do you think you can get felix to talk to me

**cinnamon babey:** Hmmm okay, only if you promise not to hit on anyone forever!

**lemme smash ;):**.

**cinnamon babey:** Fineee a week

**lemme smash ;):** I can do that!

**[Private message *angry noises* - > lemme smash ;)] **

***angry noises*:** do not call me that.

**[Private message scheming owo - > delicate uwu] [1.00 am] **

**scheming owo:** HILDA HELP


End file.
